Romeo Must Die.

Venue:Cafe in nairobery
Time:1730 hrs
Event:Me trying to romanz my kabaibe...

So i decided to make up for my physical absence from better half's side for the past two weeks by taking her for a cuppa as we catch up.Which ought to be a prity gud idea for QT ryt?WRONG!!

We were sitted thea.Me, waxing her lyrical,as i flashed my pearly whites and She, batting her sexy eyelashes at me and everything was da kodak moment until some guy walks in in a lavender shirt(not purple,lavender)some tight ass jeans and stylish gucci loaferz and i know what ur wondering,which is,what was i doing looking at dis guy-from top to down like dat when ma mrs was in da hizi-if i don't swing both ways?Well the man walked in,the full shakespeare mode:

a ginormous(gigantic+enormous) bouqet of flowers,
a poem
the kaexpensive goodiebag



So what's a brother to do in such a scenario when a negro walks in and steals the thunder pamoja with its rain at ur festival?Anyway game ni game ama..

Then ma damsel openend her mouth and spoke what seemed like everyother chic in da cafe was thinking......"How come u never do dat?"

Can u bliv dat!How nw?!

After dis man has struggled to take her to a restaraunt with an overpriced menu,undersized plates and an italian name thats an organ in da digestive system?am asked dat?!Cmon!

I smile switly to prevent myself from going into a "Nigga moment" and play blonde "What u mean honeybun?"
"U know becoming all sensitive and mellow with me?" She replies.
So i went into autopilot and just nodded as she talked and told me evrything i apparently don't do.But truly inside i was cursing "Mr. Romeo" and all his soap opera watching wanna be's who give the rest of mankind such a hard task being male.
Why couldn't he have pulled such a move in the confines of his bedroom and save us all this?I can't understand what it is, what it it do or what does what,with these brethren who put us in such uncomfy positions all in the name of being romantic.N that's why today am sending out a death warrant:
WANTED PREFERABLY DEAD THAN ALIVE
Any slick looking dude who believes he's THE gift to all mamaz
if spotted with flowers,poems,candy or any other weapon of female destruction shoot to kill,maime or disfigure.The assailant is usualy in a lavender shirt-not purple,lavender.
.Find him,Do him in.

ROMEO MUST DIE